Healing: the beginning in untold ways


Healing comes your way in untold ways

On days cloudy and sunny…it don’t matter how those small beginnings begin to unfold and phase…..

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Three months back, I decided to take up Spoken English classes for a bunch of ladies, on a whim. I just wanted to escape my mundane routine and, my eyes and my brain were craving for something new. I wanted to escape a lot of things actually. And, truth to be told, I wasn’t even sure what those things were. Funny no? You sometimes don’t even know what you run away from and, why.

Are those shadows of menace, your situations or your attitude towards your situations?

Sometimes, the running begins even before the situations knock your door.

So, was it a lull I was going through? After working for almost a decade as a freelancer who never really faced dearth in work opportunities, I suddenly felt misplaced as the place evidently wasn’t complaint to my requirements. And, given my repulsion towards socialising (believe me, my pretense in a crowd ups my deception with finesse), I had my reservations about speaking up about the things that I would love to pursue. So before I digress into how I am more comfy within the walls of my persona, I would like to take the diversion from this post towards what I am actually feeling today after completing three month course as a SPOKEN English instructor.

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My feelings at the moment : Content and overwhelmed at the same time.

Today, while the ladies finished speaking about the many topics we discussed and brainstormed over in the past one month, my heart swelled with pride at how these women who at the beginning of the course would just NOT open their mouths to say anything except a goodmorning, spoke at length about the many self selected topics such as

“About Guru Granth Sahib”,
“Life in a village: a forgotten dream”,
“Pros and Cons of Technology”,
“About Success and Failure”,
“Protection against child abuse”,
“Relationship between a mother in law and daughter in law”,
“About the Sardar Patel statue recently erected in Gujarat”

And many more…………..

But the one topic, each of them spoke with passion and confidence was “About Army life”

And, it struck me then about why these women had such an impact on me as students. While they confided in me their fears and their joys, their inhibitions and passions and, their dilemmas and decisions and much more, I realized how much I actually wanted these women in my life. As much as they wanted someone to listen to them without judgments, I wanted the same too! And if the words that I spoke comforted them as listeners, I as a teacher was as comforted and warmly by their attention.

And mind well people, I realized in a profound way through this course on why – “Attention is the highest form of respect one could give anyone!!”

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Will I miss these women? A lot. A lot more than I could imagine.

I am going to miss their giggles when I narrated funny incidents from my life in the class and, their narrations about incidents from their lives in broken English that sounded sweet.

I am going to miss their hands up in the air when j would ask “Who is going to come and share in English about the topic they have chosen to speak about?”

I am also going to miss those funny fights among them while they couldn’t agree to sharing same topics with their mates!

I am pretty much going to miss the help they collectively extended to the ones that hadtrouble saying difficult words.

And, I am going to miss their quotes on the board that would be second to greet me a good morning after them.

I am going to miss their shyness.

I am going to miss their boldness that came later.

And, I am going to miss their sisterhood a lot, that sprang from their faith in me as much as I placed mine in them.

While I taught them, I stepped OUT of a world of idiosyncrasies, obligations and misplaced arrogance and, entered INTO a world of simlicity, attention and humility.

I was happy because I was comfortable in my own skin here. I came to teach here with an open mind and, the ladies came with an open mind too. None had airs about positions and, everyone just fit in my class like a glove!

And, how the twelve weeks passed!!

The word ‘jiffy’ wouldn’t do justice!!!

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I believe this experience is first of the many new beginnings in my life. And, I got atleast one reason to say so because last week, I happened to met one of my students at a shop and, her husband walked up to me and said, “Thank you ma’am….because I don’t know if she is learning English as well as you teach….but she is definitely a very happy woman after returning from your class”

The Universe always finds ways for us to repay it back with the rewards we earn. And the repayment is a wonderful quid pro quo because…even in that, the earning of goodwill is constant.

Maybe, I don’t have a ‘fetch’ career to rave about. Maybe, I don’t have the luxury of globetrotting yet.
Maybe, I don’t have the resources to aim my goalposts yet. (Because I am one ‘incy wincy spider’ in the present)

And yet, I am a happy soul. Because, when I asked for one diversion, I was blessed with avenues I never thought of.

And, this experience was one of the many that shed its invisibility for me.

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Small beginnings are those shining beacons of hope that there is yet a lot more to look forward to in this life.

😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

P.S: One of the testimonials from one of my students…. who had a tough time giving an intro about herself and she ended up giving a speech today after three months!

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